On one of my visits back to the US, I walked into a bagel shop and bought cream cheese to take back to London. Yes, I’m serious. Scallion cream cheese, specifically. What you might call spring onion and Philadelphia if you’re not American (or Canadian?). It was a really good scallion cream cheese. And it was $5 for a small carton that I wasn’t even sure would survive an 8 hour flight.
Once I’d finished every last speck, the mourning process began. Wistful flight searches. Daydreams about when I could next get a creamy, oniony, freshly made smear onto my bagels. Then I started thinking big. What if I could make my own scallion cream cheese?
Something to rival those neighborhood bagel shops from back home.
And so I set out to whip up a scallion cream cheese recipe for those of us who can’t get this wonder spread.
The fridge stable 8 month old pre-packaged stuff is not the same and I’m not going to pretend it is. Keep on keeping on if you love it, I don’t want to stomp on your flower garden. But really, this is so much better.
Put me, this scallion cream cheese and a few bagels in a room together, and I can guarantee there won’t be any left. But I know everyone isn’t like me, so I’ve come up with other easy ways to polish off your pot of scallion cream cheese.
Quarter scallions lengthwise, then finely chop them. Combine with milk, salt and cream cheese and that’s it! If you have the patience, let it sit in the fridge for a few hours before digging in.
Bonus: Rainbow bagel, because it was so ridiculous I just had to.
Ideas for using up your scallion cream cheese
Stir it into a quiche. Stir it into the eggy quiche mix, then layer it with your favorite quiche ingredients. Maybe spinach or ham, or whatever you have in the fridge.
Layer it into your 5-6-7 layer dip and break out the tortilla chips.
Stir it into vegetable pasta.
Option 1: Cook up some asparagus or tender stem broccoli (or both) in garlic, then add a squeeze of lemon juice and lemon zest. Stir the cream cheese into pasta, gently incorporate the green vegetables and top with grated parmesan.
Option 2: Pump up a super-easy lasagne-style pasta bowl.
Pile it onto a baked potato, sweet or otherwise. Top with chopped bacon, pan fried mushrooms or just fresh herbs.
Stuff it into chiles, cover them in bread crumbs and bake for pepper poppers.
Serves 2 tbsp
5 minPrep Time
5 minCook Time
10 minTotal Time
Save RecipeOn the Counter
- 180g (8 oz) container of cream cheese (I use Philadelphia)
- 2 scallions/spring onions
- 1 tsp milk
- 1/4 tsp salt
What to Do
- Quarter the spring onions, lengthwise. Slice them finely
- Scoop the cream cheese into a bowl, and add the milk. Break up the cream cheese then stir to combine and thin out the cheese.
- Add in the salt and spring onions, and stir until the spring onions are evenly distributed.
- Put the cream cheese back into its container and refrigerate.
- It's good right away but tastes a lot better if you let it chill for at least a few hours.
In case you haven’t heard, kale will probably save your life. If you’re drowning, kale will swim out and rescue you. If you’ve fallen and you can’t get up, kale will call an ambulance and get you a pillow while you wait.
Luckily, kale can also be pretty tasty. Is there nothing you can’t do, kale?
Kale also does great work as a counselor. If you’ve had too many, oh, I don’t know, Cadbury eggs recently, a bowlful of kale with a zingy dressing will assuage your guilt.
It’s a simple concept, a kale Caesar salad. Strip it, steam it, dress it, eat it.
A kale protip I only learned recently: After thoroughly washing it, you can strip the leafy parts from the stems. Just tear it off from top to bottom easily.
Skip the croutons if you’re gluten-free, or just make them with GF bread. I’ve never used it for croutons myself, but apparently it works.
Psst… If you’re looking for a dairy-free (or vegan) version, you can always substitute the yogurty Caesar for this tahini dressing. Just saying…
Serves Serves 2
15 minPrep Time
20 minCook Time
40 minTotal Time
Save RecipeOn the Counter
- 2 slices of barely-stale loaf bread, ideally sourdough, and ideally not sliced bread
- 2 tsp olive oil (extra virgin if you have it)
- 1/4 tsp salt
- a few grinds of fresh black pepper
- 100 g kale without stems
- 1/4 tsp table salt
- 1 tbsp olive oil
- Juice from 1 lemon wedge
- Parmesan or vegetarian hard cheese
- 2 tbsp plain unsweetened yogurt
- Lemon juice from about 1/4 of a lemon
- A dash of Worcestershire sauce, or 1/8 tsp vegetarian miso paste
- 1 medium clove garlic, minced finely. (Don't use a garlic press as it will be too strong)
- Pinch of ground sea salt or table salt
What to Do
- Chop your bread into about 2 cm (0.5 in) cubes. If it's very stale, you might need to drizzle oil on it to start and give it a few minutes to soften before chopping. If you do, skip the oil in the next step.
- Preheat the oven to 180C (350F). Toss the bread cubes, pepper and salt together.
- On a rimmed baking sheet or dish, spread the cubes out so they're one even layer.
- Bake for 5 minutes.
- Toss them around so other sides get exposure.
- Bake for a few more minutes, until golden brown, but check on them frequently.
- Thoroughly rinse and dry the kale.
- From the bottom strip the leaves from the stems in as few tears as possible.
- Lightly salt the torn kale leaves.
- In a steamer over a boiling pot of water, steam the kale for 5 minutes or until tender and still a vibrant green.
- Once it's ready, rinse it under cold water or give it an ice bath. You don't want to cook it any longer.
- Now, either rub (or toss if you're feeling lazy) the leaves with olive oil, then add a few squeezes of fresh lemon juice and toss it together.
- You can make the dressing in advance, or while the kale is steaming.
- Combine yogurt, lemon juice, garlic, salt, Worcestershire sauce. Stir together thoroughly.
- Once it's finished, top the kale with dressing, croutons and some freshly grated Parmesan or vegetarian hard cheese.